Expansion is on the other side of your contraction
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I have been thinking a lot about expansion and contraction lately and this is one of the best visuals I have seen on it
Peter Levine (one of my heroes) calls it pendulation.
He says “Every contraction is followed with an expansion” But when we are in the contraction season we tell ourselves we are broken, something is wrong with us, we need to be fixed etc etc. Five years ago, this week I had a major contraction (and I mean major) happen. I blew up my world in so many ways, and walked away from a life and friends I unconsciously thought made me special and important. I was terrified of what my life would look like. I had turned in my book about healing and I felt more despair and fear than I had in years. I told myself the meanest, most hateful stories. My inner critic told me I was a fraud, a has-been, a total fuck up. I believed I did not deserve to have friends. I stopped sleeping and would have major panic attacks all night long. The stories my brain was telling me were so hateful.
I try to remind myself of this truth every time I'm in a contraction state because this cycle will go on until the day we die! I can forget so easily and tell myself that something is dreadfully wrong and bad when I am contracting. I had a pretty expansive year with my work, relationship, and finances in 2023 and it makes sense to me that a contraction and overwhelm came after that. My nervous system is still catching up with all the major changes happening in my life and that is normal. It does not mean something is wrong with me, it just means I am human! I can already feel more expansion coming on the other side.
Beautiful human, If you are struggling greatly right now, I hope this message feels so hopeful to you. There is so much expansion for you on the other side when you stick with it, allow yourself to feel the feelings, get the support you need, and remind yourself that you are not broken, you are just human!
Every single version of you deserves love and care. The version that is expanding and the version that is contracting. ESPECIALLY THAT CONTRACTED VERSION. Our bodies and minds deserve so much love and yet we are so damn hard on ourselves. E will often say to me, “be so nice to Ruthie today” when I tell him some of the mean stories my inner critic is saying. (that voice is never the true you by the way)
You get to be so human!!!
HAPPENING TOMORROW: ASK RUTHIE
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